Danville, Kentucky -- Folks, I woke up this morning still drunk. I over-slept and forget to take my nephew to school. My head still feels like a cinder-block, and I can't quite see straight. At about 11 AM, Danville time, I began to notice lots of twitter notifications on my phone. My mentions were filled with vicious attacks like this:
@TWTWsports it was Oasis at Knebworth you melt— TheSteed (@TheSteed) November 7, 2016
@TWTWsports It is Oasis at Knebworth, you fucking retard.— North of the console (@North_console) November 7, 2016
@RealCSI @kane021601 @TWTWsports @realDonaldTrump you're both retarded, because that "Trump rally" picture is an Oasis concert— wellerrocks (@afc_weller) November 7, 2016
@TWTWsports then YOU sir are a fucking idiot— Falselord (@strobeskull) November 7, 2016
@TWTWsports it is categorically not a photo from a Trump rally in Iowa. It's a photo from an Oasis concert. You thick cunt.— Alex (@Dougal101084) November 6, 2016
@TWTWsports That's not a Trump rally you dumb arse, that's a photo from a music concert in Knebworth in the UK.— Nigel Wallis (@Mole_9) November 6, 2016
@TWTWsports @realDonaldTrump— Adam Baron (@Baron1991) November 6, 2016
That Trump rally is a picture of Oasis at Knebworth you complete and utter fucking weapon.
What's all the fuss about? This tweet of mine:
After groggily reaching for my phone this morning only to discover a stream of hateful tweets full of incomprehensible limey slang, I found this article.@realDonaldTrump Trump has so much ENTHUSIASM and GROUND GAME. Hillary's rallies are empty! Sad!https://t.co/gjxnuT750j pic.twitter.com/FaXPwTYuPX— The Will To Win (@TWTWsports) November 5, 2016
The crooked NME (New Musical Express) alleged that I falsified images of a Trump rally by misrepresenting pictures of an Oasis concert.Trump supporters using @Oasis photos to promote his rallies https://t.co/kB8SszV93L pic.twitter.com/H1Y5wEbSho— NME (@NME) November 7, 2016
Folks, the failing NME has no grounds to criticize me. These are the guys who regularly put androgynous degenerates like Morrissey, Jarvis Cocker, David Bowie, and Jack Lydon on their covers. They didn't disavow John Lennon after his blasphemous proclamation that his band was "Bigger than Jesus" in 1966. Now, they're using their considerable influence on social media to direct torrents of trolls at innocent Trump supporters like me. They're screaming that I'm a liar for all the internet to hear. The NME's megaphone must be taken away.
Folks, I stand by my tweet. My auto mechanic friend in Algona, Iowa -- a man I trust with both my Ford 1-50 truck and my life -- swears on his golden retriever's life that the pictures are from a Trump rally in Davenport this past summer. My buddy took the photos himself. I trust my buddy in Algona far more than a magazine that continually publishes glowing reviews of albums by metrosexual bands like Coldplay and Keane.
Thankfully, I will only have to endure this injustice for one more day. Come tomorrow, Trump will be president and the libel laws will be tightened. In Trump's America, awful journalism like the NME will no longer be tolerated.